Do I wish I could go back?

ImageI look at this photo and it really triggers a strong memory of not feeling lovable or enough as a little girl.  And I am realizing it’s all about not knowing…discovering, and connecting the dots to now, which leads me to accepting and loving Self now.  My not knowing that I was lovable then has actually been the disguised gift, the catalyst, that brought me to this very place, this very moment in my quest for self-realization, forgiveness, acceptance and true love of Self.  If I had known then that I was indeed lovable, my passions, inspirations, my calling if you will, would be something completely different, and then I would not be the “me” that I am today. Often times what we struggle with in our personal lives becomes the teacher’s fire to help others heal if we are willing to be raw; ready-able-willing to heal ourselves.

I was raw as a little girl, always eager to please, to find the warmth in someone’s eyes, seeking attention, wanting to belong.  And I am still raw today, still eager to please, but not from a co-dependent place.  I am eager to help other’s to heal from a personal knowing of how one’s life can shift immeasurably from despair to fulfillment.  I have been blessed with a profound deep purpose to seek to understand others in their own human-mess.  Ironically it was born out of my personal pain from when I was a child.

So no, I do not wish I could go back and tell myself what I know now… because then I would not have become the who I am now, in this moment.

Be you.

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4 thoughts on “Do I wish I could go back?

  1. I luv this, Andrea. Thank you for sharing with me. I, like the other commentor, am very grateful for who you are in the world and for your gifts which you share with others. In gratitude, Laura

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